I waited over an hour to get a wireless signal so I could do this post before I go to bed. Now I just want to watch old Friends episodes on Nick @ Nite. I don’t have cable at home. This is as much a luxury as not having to walk a dog before I have my coffee tomorrow morning.
I’m going through the motions. With this post. With this job interview. With my drive today. Time is passing and I’m just letting it pass, hoping that something changes and that when it does, it’s for the better. I think I’m numb. I just don’t care. I wish I did.
I thought a little on the drive down about people who do the things they love. I feel like it’s too late for me. Like if I didn’t figure it out in college, or at least in my twenties, that it’s too late and I have to settle with the path I started down regardless of whether it’s right or not. (Given that when I was thinking of Those People, I was green with envy, I’m guessing it’s likely not right.)
I want to be one of Those People. And I’m not. And I don’t think I will be if I take one of these jobs.