Tags

,

My house had its first customer tonight. She was not an investor, but someone who would be moving in. I keep telling myself to let it go. I won’t know until I know. I keep shrugging my shoulders. I’m not quite sure how that helps, but lying in bed, alone in my house, I just paused for a minute in typing and shrugged my shoulders. I think it’s my way of saying, “Oh well, it doesn’t matter.” But that’s a lie; it does matter to me.

I was home tonight earlier than I had planned. I tried to relax by turning on the TV, but I didn’t find it particularly interesting. I was in bed by 8:30, paid my bills, and did some browsing for a spiritual center near me.

Waiting on a fantasy is easier than getting on with the business of living my life. I am making a commitment, right here and now, to go about the business of living anyway. I am making a commitment to me. This is my time. This is the place.

I want to say, “I have absolutely no idea how to begin.” But that too is a lie. I do know. I just have to listen and be willing to hear.