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It’s 8:43 PM and I can barely keep my eyes open.

I want to be happier. I keep looking for the means to get myself there. I keep looking at myself and my life like a puzzle to solve. As if once all the pieces are aligned, something magical will happen. My ideas are not bad ones. Still, I can’t help but think I’m going about this the wrong way.

I am not a puzzle to solve; I am a person worth getting to know. I want so badly to let go of the fixes, the solutions, the Ideas, and just breathe a little more. Be a little kinder, a little gentler, with me. Uncover myself. Discover myself. Get to know who I am, with all my vices, all my neuroses, all my guilt, judgment and shame. Because I am worth getting to know.

I am the magical something. I just don’t know it yet.